When I was growing up, I was a passive person.
Maybe you were too, or you know what I’m talking about. I didn’t realize the power that I held. I wasn’t used to hearing or knowing my own voice. I didn’t speak up. I waited for people to see me (they usually didn’t).
For instance, when I was 16 and learning how to drive, my father took me out to a parking lot area in the back of school in our neighborhood. Mind you, I don’t remember this at all (my brother told me this story after my father relayed it to him). I was behind the wheel and I’m sure I was scared stiff. I wasn’t doing well and I wasn’t reacting to the instructions my father was giving me. I was creeping along, not going fast, but he was telling me to turn to avoid rolling into a tree that was in front of me.
All I had to do was turn my wheel. But, for whatever reason, I didn’t. I couldn’t. I slowly. Rolled. Into the. Tree.
That’s kind of indicitive of how I did life, lol. I tried to be a good, little girl, but for the life of me, couldn’t figure things out. I tried to do what was expected of me, and find out my purpose. Or really, I hoped my purpose would reveal itself to me.
When I decided to follow Jesus at 19 and gave my life to him, I thought, OK here is where it all begins. I wanted – and expected – that if I had enough of this thing called “faith”, God would make it happen for me. He would give me the life and calling of my dreams.
So, I prayed. Had “faith”. And waited.
As I looked around at others, frustrations grew. Though I was doing what I thought was “right” — getting married, having kids, going to church — I felt like I was going backwards, never forwards, and that somehow maybe God favored them more than me???
I spent decades of my life busted and disgusted with my circumstances. It wasn’t that I went through major trauma…I just couldn’t seem to get a handle on my life. Things felt constantly like they were out of my grasp no matter what I tried. Perhaps you can relate.
Perhaps, most frustrating of them all was that I’d start business after business, but they would constantly fail.
It felt like there was never enough money in the bank account to thrive.
My relationships didn’t thrive (I even went through a crazy divorce).
Even my relationship with God felt stagnant.
Despite years of personal struggle, God is good. He brought me to a place of understanding the power of the mind and personal development, of which Breakthrough Boards and personal development are a major key. I finally started understanding that the problem was not “out there” but within me.
I am a mother, ordained minister, public speaker & teacher, writer and entrepreneur (just like you!). Creative visualization, Breakthrough Boards and The Law of Faith are passions of mine and I love to equip and inspire ambitious ladypreneurs!
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